Easy Way Out
by Junebugsm
Summary: Callie gets drunk in an attempt to escape from the constant anxiety of seeing Liam everywhere she goes and Stef must figure out what's going on with her daughter.


**Callie gets drunk in an attempt to escape from the constant anxiety of seeing Liam everywhere she goes and Stef must figure out what's going on with her daughter.**

(Takes place during **Truth Be Told (205)** soon after Callie thinks she see's Liam at the Burger Stand. - A request by a guest - At least I think it was a request. It was posted as a review to my story **Trust** in the form of a statement.)

* * *

 _She had seen him now in seven different places - once in the face of a customer at the Burger Stand, three times in random guys as she was walking home, once in the grocery store checkout boy as she stopped to pick up some milk like Lena had asked, and even once in a young boy riding his bicycle down the street._

Callie knew now for certain that her lack of commitment to Wyatt stemmed from Liam and not Brandon. At first that relieved her - at least she wasn't at risk of losing her entire family due to feelings for Brandon. But eventually, when the anxiety increased and she saw Liam everywhere she turned she began to panic. She was starting to get afraid to look anywhere around her. Any blond immediately took on the face of her nightmare and Callie just needed to find a way to make it stop.

She had gone for a walk, hoping that the fresh air would clear her mind, but still she saw his face. The boy on the bicycle couldn't have been more than twelve years old but the blond hair and the fact that he was sitting down made her mind think it was Liam. Callie quickly turned a corner, worried that the boy would turn around soon and head back the way he had come. She walked a few steps and passed a flatbed stocked with beer and chips and such supplies - obviously someone was going to have a party tonight.

Before she could think about what she was doing, Callie grabbed a six-pack and quickly disappeared down the street before anyone saw her.

* * *

Callie found a quiet spot on the rocks outside the school. It was almost six in the evening so no one was around apart from the few people jogging. Callie ducked behind the rocks where she wouldn't be seen and opened the first beer. As she sat there thinking about her life she felt herself relax just a little. They had never been in such a good home before. For the first time Callie honestly felt like she woudn't be hurt. Like she could actually let her guard down. She finally had the family she had always wanted and all they were waiting for was Robert and his signiture. She had two amazing mothers who not only looked after her but also genuenly cared and loved her and though it had taken her a while to accept and get used to the idea she had finally just allowed them to love her the way she deserved to be loved. She had two more brothers and a sister that she had grown to love just like she loved Jude and a boyfriend that really cared about her and accepted her for who she is. And most of all Callie was happiest that they were safe. She didn't have to worry about Jude anymore - he would always have more than she had ever been able to give him. He was adopted and loved and for the rest of his life he would have the family he always dreamed of.

But suddenly this one nightmare of Callie's had come back. She thought she'd be over it by now - be able to give herself to someone she cared about and who loved her but just having Wyatt on top of her had made her panic and she realized that she hadn't gotten over it - just buried it and not really ever dealt with it. The problem was that she didn't know how to deal with it - all she wanted to do was forget but it seemed that if she even tried to cross that bridge the right way, Liam's face would pop back into her mind and the only way Callie knew how to forget was this... with that thought she opened the second beer and continued.

* * *

It was seven twenty when Callie's phone began to ring. By now she had finished five of the six beers and was lying against the rocks - too tipsy to keep herself upright and at some point had kicked off her shoes and sunk her feet ankle deep into the sand.

Callie pulled out her phone and answered the call, not even checking the time or the caller.

"Hello." She somewhat slurred.

"Where are you?" Someone questioned though Callie couldn't make out the voice.

"Who is this?" Callie drawled and Stef instantly knew that Callie was drunk.

"Callie where are you?" Stef asked more firmly. It was a school night and curfew was seven but now it was twenty past and Callie still hadn't come home. Lena had told her that Callie had gone for a walk almost two hours ago but still hadn't come back.

"I'm over here." Callie answered in an almost obvious tone - where else would she be.

Stef sighed as she disconnected the call and tracked Callie's phone to the beach. "She's drunk." Stef explained to Lena who was in the middle of making dinner. "I'm going to get her. She's in no condition to come back on her own."

* * *

It took a few minutes for Stef to find Callie. The tracking device gave her a general location but since Callie was hiding amongst the rocks it wasn't that easy for Stef to reach her. When she finally spotted the lump that was her daughter her anger intensified. She was half lying against a rock with empty beer cans all around her, her phone tossed in the sand after Stef had called and her shoes kicked off randomly.

"What do you think you're doing?" Stef asked angrily, startling Callie out of her daze.

Callie didn't reply, just stared at her with sad, wide eyes, wondering what exactly was happening.

"What is this Callie?" Stef asked more softly, realizing that the teen was in no state to talk just yet. "Get up, let's go home."

As Callie stumbled up Stef helped support her and brushed whatever sand she could off the girl before leading her to the car. She wondered what exactly had happened to cause her usually straightforward daughter to do something like this.

"I've got her Lena." Stef said over the phone, informing her wife that their daughter was safe. "She's drunk but obviously upset about something. I'm going to take her straight upstairs for a shower, she's covered in sand and I'd like to avoid the other kids seeing her like this."

* * *

Stef led Callie straight upstairs to the master bathroom while the rest of the family had dinner. Callie had managed to get sand in her socks, jeans and even her hair and Stef just couldn't put her to bed until she got her cleaned up.

Callie wasn't too drunk to be a giggling mess but she was drunk enough to need help with almost every step so Stef quickly helped her undress and led her into the stall where she sat Callie down on a stool under the shower spray and began to wash her hair like she would a young child. Stef felt relieved that Callie didn't seem to be putting up a fight for this. She knew that a sober Callie would never in a million years allow someone to bathe her like this. But to keep Callie from being too uncomfortable Stef worked fast at washing Callie's hair and rinsing the sand off the rest of her and then she pulled out a pair of track pants and a top from the dryer for Callie to wear.

"Come on love." Stef said gently as she guided Callie into bed. She desperately wanted to talk to Callie but she was pretty sure the girl wouldn't say a word - not in this state at least. Each time Stef had asked her why she did this Callie's only reply would be that she needed a break but not once would she tell Stef what exactly she needed a break from.

So instead Stef tucked Callie into the middle of the double bed and climbed in beside her, stroking her hair rhythmically until Callie fell asleep.

* * *

"What happened?" Lena asked fifteen minutes later when she came up with a bottle of water and aspirin for Callie along with two sandwiches for both of them.

"I'm not sure." Stef answered honestly as Lena began to change for bed. "She just keeps saying she needed a break but she wouldn't say from what."

"Has she eaten anything?" Lena asked as she looked at her sleeping daughter.

"No." Stef said. "But I doubt she could right now anyways. She'd probably just throw it up."

"At least she's asleep." Lena said, relieved that Callie wasn't up doing god knows what.

"She had an entire six pack on her own." Stef said. "I don't even know how she got them. They aren't the kind we have in the fridge."

"She seemed a little down when she came home this evening but when I asked her she just said it was a hard day at work." Lena said, remembering her conversation with the girl earlier.

"I'm pretty sure it's more than that for her to do something like this." Stef said, wondering once again what it could be.

"Well she's going to have one massive headache when she wakes up." Lena said as she crawled into bed on the other side of Callie.

"We'll let her sleep tomorrow." Stef said. "She won't be able to focus at school anyways. I'll stay with her and hopefully get her to talk while the rest of the kids are in school."

"Okay." Lena said, knowing that if anyone could get the truth out of their stubborn, determined daughter it was her stubborn, determined wife.

* * *

When Callie woke up the following morning the sun was high and streaming through the open window. She squinted as she looked around and realized in surprise that she was lying next to Stef in their bed. Stef's eyes were closed and an arm was draped casually over her eyes, obviously blocking out the sun. The rest of the house was quiet and Callie realized that it was past ten and so probably everyone was already at school.

Trying to be as quiet and careful as possible Callie got up, hoping to leave the room without waking Stef but that was not to be.

"I'm not asleep and you're not going anywhere." Stef said as she sat up in bed.

Callie sighed as she sunk back onto the bed, regretting the move immensely when her head began to throb.

Stef got up and handed Callie the water and aspirin and looked at her daughter as Callie sat on the bed looking back at her. Neither of them knew quite what to say. Stef wanted to know what was going on in Callie's mind and while she knew that something had to have happened she was still upset with the girl for choosing to get drunk as a way of escaping her problems.

Callie knew she was in trouble. She'd known she'd be in trouble before she even opened the first beer but at the time it was the only thing she could think of that would help her forget. As she looked at Stef she could see the anger and concern on the older woman's face but behind that she could also see the sadness and desperation. Callie knew that Stef wanted to help her and the only way she could do that was if Callie opened up to her but Callie just didn't have it in her.

"What happened love?" Stef finally asked once Callie had taken the pills she was given.

But Callie remained silent, just as Stef expected she would.

"This isn't like you Callie." Stef continued. "You know better." Stef waited for Callie to respond but when the girl continued to remain silent she became slightly more firm. "You're going to have to give me something Callie. This isn't a joke and I'm not playing games."

"I just needed a break." Callie finally said the same thing she's been saying since last night, desperate for Stef to stop lecturing her.

"A break from what?" Stef asked, wanting more details.

"I just had a bad day and I made a stupid mistake." Callie answered superficially.

"This isn't a 'bad day' type thing Callie." Stef said firmly. She understood that Callie had never done something like this before but Callie did tend to try and find the easy way out sometimes and she wanted to make it clear to the girl that drinking her problems away wasn't the answer.

"I know, I'm sorry. It won't happen again." Callie said, still trying to avoid going into detail. But she knew Stef wouldn't go for it. She was too determined to fix things, especially when it came to her family. It was the one thing that made all the kids feel safe and secure when Stef was around even though they cribbed that she was interfering.

"Callie, you and I both know there has to be more than that." Stef stated just as Callie suspected she would. "So how about you just talk to me so that I can help you and we get to the bottom of this whole mess."

Callie was quiet for a few moments as she worked up the courage to give her mom what she wanted. She didn't want to talk about her attempt at sex with Wyatt that had led to this whole thing in the first place. It was awkward and embarrassing and she wasn't quite sure how Stef would react, so she figured that giving Stef just the direct reason would work - after all, wasn't seeing your rapist's face enough reason to get drunk.

"I thought I saw Liam at the Burger Stand yesterday." Callie finally answered, honestly but evasively.

"Thought?" Stef confirmed, softening slightly now that Callie was opening up.

"It wasn't him." Callie clarified. "It just looked like him for a second and I guess it just freaked me out more than I thought it would."

Stef observed Callie for a moment. Her eyes were filled with sadness and she had a childlike innocence on her face, almost like she was waiting for Stef to find some magical fix-it for her. She couldn't even imagine what the girl was going through and in a way she understood why she sought comfort in alcohol but at the same time she wished that Callie had come to either one of them instead.

"Sweetheart, I know that had to have been hard." Stef said, pulling Callie close to her so she could hold her. "I understand how that might have upset you but love you can't do that again. It's unhealthy, dangerous and it's just not going to solve anything."

"I know." Callie said softly. She knew it was just a temporary fix and that the problems would probably still arise again but at the time she had just been desperate.

"I know you know that." Stef went on. She couldn't get the image of her drunk daughter out of her head and she was just thankful she had gotten to her before someone else had or before Callie tried to do something herself that would cause her harm. "But you were lucky, if someone else had found you like that and taken advantage of you or if you had tried to walk home alone anything could have happened."

"I know." Callie repeated, frustrated this time. "I just needed to stop seeing his face everywhere." She just wanted Stef to stop lecturing her and without realizing it she had given out more information than she had intended to.

"What do you mean by 'everywhere'?" Stef asked, pulling away from Callie to get a better look at her.

"I..." Callie stuttered, wondering what to say. "Um... I mean..." But she couldn't think fast enough.

"Callie." Stef said firmly. "Start from the top and I want the truth this time. The whole truth." She stated clearly, letting her daughter know that skirting around the issue wasn't an option anymore.

Callie looked like a deer caught in headlights. She knew there was no getting out of this and while she knew that Stef would never hurt her and would do everything in her power to help her she was still uncomfortable talking about sex with the woman. Mother or not she had only known her for seven months.

"Callie." Stef repeated softly as she pulled Callie close again, knowing that if she made Callie feel like she was in trouble then there was no way the girl would talk. She had a knack for keeping things to herself and trying to solve all her problems on her own.

"I kept seeing his face everywhere." Callie finally admitted as she leaned into Stef's embrace. "Any blond looked like him wherever I went and I just couldn't get it to stop."

"When did it start?" Stef asked curiously.

"Yesterday at the diner." Callie answered. "And then in random guys on the way home; Lena asked me to pick up milk and the guy at the cash counter looked like him for a moment; even a little blond kid on a bike looked like Liam and he was only like Jude's age."

Callie looked drained but at the same time it looked like a weight had been taken off her and Stef felt relieved that she was opening up.

"Something must have triggered it." Stef said, not sure if Callie even knew what it was but the way Callie looked down at her hands told her that she did. Stef held Callie protectively as she spoke to her. "You know what triggered it." She stated knowingly.

Callie nodded, glancing up at Stef for a moment before looking away again.

"You know you can talk to us about anything." Stef reminded Callie. "There is nothing you need to hide from us. Whether you think you'll be in trouble or you're nervous or you feel awkward talking to us, you have to remember that we are on your side and we will do everything we can to help you."

Callie nodded. She did know that. It had taken her a while to actually believe it but now she was positive that they would help her but it didn't change the fact that it was embarrassing talking to Stef about sex.

"What happened?" Stef asked softly, beckoning Callie to let her in.

Once again Callie looked up at Stef and the two looked each other in the eye for a few moments - Callie working up the courage to tell Stef the truth and Stef showing Callie that she was there and ready to help with whatever Callie had to say.

"Wyatt and I tried to have sex." Callie finally mumbled, looking away from Stef as her cheeks turned a soft shade of pink.

Stef smiled slightly to herself as she watched Callie. The girl that was always so tough, always trying to fix things herself, make things easy for others was suddenly so shy and Stef wished she was more like this all the time - childlike and worry-free.

"I'm guessing that by the word 'tried' it means it didn't actually happen." Stef said, not wanting to stay silent for too long in case Callie misinterpreted her silence.

Callie shook her head. "I sorta freaked out." She answered her mother, finding it surprisingly easy now to tell the truth.

Although Stef wasn't in any way upset or angry with Callie she was still extremely protective of her and she just couldn't help but ask the next question.

"Did he do something to make you uncomfortable?" She asked her daughter, holding her breath as she waited for a reply.

"No." Callie answered. "He was being..." But she trailed off finding it hard to say 'gentle' while talking about this. "I just didn't like him on top of me, I felt like I had no control and I needed to get out."

"And he stopped immediately?" Stef confirmed.

"Yes." Callie answered. "He was confused but I just wasn't ready to talk about it so he dropped me off at work and that's when I began to see Liam everywhere."

"Okay, that's good." Stef said, relieved that Wyatt hadn't made things worse for Callie.

The two sat in silence for a few minutes, both thinking things through - Callie about what had happened and Stef about how to help her.

"I can't understand what you must have been feeling." Stef said honestly, deciding to open up to her daughter as much as possible to help her. "For me, sex with Mike was never the same as sex with Lena but still it was never forced on me so while I never really understood it until Lena, it was still not a traumatic experience."

Callie looked at Stef with wide eyes for a moment before her pink cheeks turned completely red and she looked away again.

Stef smiled in amusement. She loved this side of Callie. Right now she was just like every other kid in the world - embarrassed to hear about her mothers' sex life.

"I'm not trying to embarrass you love." Stef amended. "I just mean that I don't know exactly what you're going through. But what I do know is that being nervous the first time you have sex with someone, and especially the first time you ever have sex is normal. Everyone feels like that, especially when both of you are new to it."

Callie now looked back at Stef. She was curious about what Stef had to say and relieved that she wasn't talking about anyone in particular.

"I get that it may be a bigger hurdle for you but there is absolutely nothing wrong with you for being nervous or scared. And as for not being able to go through with it - that happens as well." Stef assured her daughter.

"But what do I tell Wyatt?" Callie asked, worried about what the boy would think.

"What do you want to tell him?" Stef asked back. "Are you okay with telling him what really happened with Liam?"

"I don't know." Callie answered. "You guys were the first people I ever told and I haven't told anyone since."

"Okay." Stef said, realizing that Callie still wasn't quite ready to cross that bridge. "How about you start by telling him that you just aren't ready yet."

Callie nodded slightly, uncertain whether that was be enough for Wyatt or not.

"Honey, if Wyatt really cares about you, and I think that he does, he will respect your decision. He may not fully understand it just like I don't but he will respect it and wait until you're ready." Stef told Callie, wanting to make it clear to the girl that not being ready yet and choosing to wait is perfectly acceptable.

"Will I ever be ready?" Callie asked in a small voice, afraid of the answer.

"I think you will." Stef answered honestly. "When it's the right time and the right person you will get through it. You may be nervous and there may be a few more misses but eventually it will happen."

Callie felt relieved that Stef believed she could do it. It wasn't that she desperately wanted it to happen right now but she just wanted to get over it and cross that bridge already. She didn't like the uncertainty of whether or not it would happen. But the truth was that Stef was right - she wasn't ready just yet.

But there was more that Callie wanted to asked and Stef could tell that Callie was nervous. She hoped that it was just the topic and not the fact that they were talking. She wanted Callie to feel comfortable enough to talk to her about anything.

Stef then decided to try a different angle. Asking Callie right out to talk to her wouldn't work very well so instead she hinted that it was okay to ask whatever questions she had.

"Mariana was just ten years old when we started talking to her about sex." Stef said, hoping to sound casual. "She would be starting her period soon and we wanted her to know what was coming."

"Your first period is kinda scary." Callie agreed lightheartedly.

Stef wanted to ask about Callie's first time but now wasn't the right time. She was trying to get the girl to open up about what was currently going through her head so she could maybe help her solve whatever was bothering her.

"She had so many questions, it took her days to get them all answered." Stef continued, hinting that it was okay to ask questions.

"I'll bet." Callie mumbled and once again Stef wanted to ask her about it, wondering who had answered her questions, if anyone.

"At first she was embarrassed." Stef went on, still using Mariana as an example. "She had long since gotten over her shyness and nervousness around us but still, she was embarrassed asking us about this. But eventually I think her curiosity won the better of her."

Callie glanced up at Stef for a moment. She knew what she was doing. She knew Stef wanted her to talk and in all honesty she wanted to talk as well but she still felt uncomfortable. She hadn't been with Stef and Lena very long and though they had never given her any reason to feel like she couldn't be open with them, she still felt a little awkward.

But she did have questions and she wanted to ask them. Once again she glanced up at Stef and saw the woman looking back at her, waiting patiently for Callie to work through whatever it was she was thinking.

"Will it always hurt?" Callie asked softly. "I mean, it just hurt so bad when Liam..." She trailed off. "Will it always be like that?"

"Honey, what happened with Liam isn't sex." Stef said. "It's nothing like what sex really is. Yes, it usually hurts the first time but it's not like what you went through. Sex isn't bad. It may take a few not so successful tries before it actually begins to feel right but that's how it is for everyone."

"What does 'not so successful' mean?" Callie asked, hoping it didn't mean painful.

"Awkward, messy, maybe a little uncomfortable." Stef answered.

"But not painful?" Callie clarified.

"Most likely not." Stef said. "It only really hurts the first time because the hymen breaks and it's not so excruciating then either."

"It was pretty bad for me." Callie said.

"Well with sex there's a lot to do before you actually have intercourse. I'm sure Liam didn't do any of that so your body wasn't ready for him and that just made it hurt all the more." Stef explained. She knew that Callie knew all this in theory but was probably afraid that that's all it was - a theory.

"I couldn't even get through that." Callie said, realizing that the moment Wyatt was on top of her she panicked.

"Give it a little time love." Stef said gently. "This was just your first try yes?"

Callie nodded. This was the first time she'd ever even considered trying.

Stef liked Wyatt. Though he'd helped Callie run away he'd turned things around and did the right thing in the end. One of the most important things she liked about him was that he was good to Callie. He was always ready to defend her and had been there for her when no one else was. But Stef still had to ask the next question - simply because this was her daughter and she had to protect her any way she could.

"Did Wyatt pressure you in any way?" Stef asked, knowing that the answer was probably 'no'. "Were you ready to give it a try?"

"No." Callie said quickly but then realized that both questions had opposite answers. "No he didn't pressure me." She clarified. "We'd sort of talked about it but because I'm not supposed to have sex we didn't do anything about it."

Stef nodded. She didn't want to interrupt Callie but she was glad that Callie was talking her parole seriously. Though in this case she knew that no one but Callie could control this - not the state, not her and Lena, not anyone besides Callie. If Callie wanted to have sex she'd find a way just like every other teenager did.

"But then when Jude stopped talking and I was trying hard to find a way to change that Wyatt sort of put it in my head that this was something only Jude could control. All our lives we've had decisions made for us and we've had no say in anything but this was something nobody could decide for Jude and I sort of understood what he meant and I just wanted to have some say in something as well and so..." She trailed off, not needed to say the words.

"Okay." Stef said gently, careful not to show any judgement. "I understand that. You aren't exactly a child anymore and if it weren't for your parole we would not have a problem with it as long as you are being safe and are comfortable with how far you go." She said, making it clear to Callie that they weren't upset with her. "But, if this is just a way for you to feel in control but it's not something you actually want then you're only doing yourself more harm."

"No, I know." Callie assured. "I want it. I thought I'd be fine with it. I didn't expect to have a panic attack, but when I realized I wasn't ready I stopped it and Wyatt didn't push it further. He didn't even insist on an explanation though I know he's confused."

"I'm sure he is." Stef agreed, just imagining what must be going through the young boy's mind. "But I'm glad that he was respectful of your choice."

"He was." Callie assured, knowing that it was something Stef worried about. "I just realized that I had some stuff to work out. Stuff I thought I'd gotten over but obviously not."

"Fair enough." Stef said, understanding completely that Callie had demons she needed to face before everything in her life just fell into place. "But honey, drinking isn't dealing with it."

"I know." Callie said remorsefully. "It wasn't a plan or anything. It was just a one time thing."

"Okay." Stef said. "But believe me when I say that sometimes 'a one time thing' can take over and you will lose control faster than you imagine."

"No, I know. I would never do that." Callie said. And she wouldn't - she had enough problems without adding alcohol or drugs to the mix.

"Okay." Stef said, glad that Callie was at least aware of what the risks were. "Because all that is really doing is masking the problem. It's an easy way out in the short term but eventually it all catches up to you."

"I'm not going to become an alcoholic." Callie said, trying to ease Stef's mind. "I'm not stupid. I know it won't solve anything. It really was just a one time thing because I was freaking out. I didn't mean it. I just saw the beers in the back of someone's truck as I was walking around and I grabbed them without really thinking about it. It won't happen again, I promise."

"Okay." Stef said, though they both knew she'd be keeping an eye on Callie for a while.

Callie smiled awkwardly at Stef. She liked that Stef cared enough to do things for her that weren't exactly comfortable in order to protect or defend her.

"You know we love you yes?" Stef asked again.

"Yes." Callie smiled.

"And you know you can come to us when something's bothering you." Stef continued down the same path on which this conversation had begun.

"Yes." Callie said again.

"Even if you think it'll get you in trouble." Stef confirmed.

"I know." Callie said. "Sometimes I just need to figure out what the problem is before I can explain it to anyone else."

"Okay." Stef said, satisfied as she pulled Callie closer and rested the young girl's head on her shoulder and stroked her hair lovingly.

"So..." Callie said after a few moments of silence. "I'm off the hook right?" She teased, knowing that it wouldn't end that easily.

"Not a chance." Stef looked down at her daughter. "You are grounded for two weeks. Besides school, work and group you need to be home and this evening we are going to whoever's house to pay for the beers you stole."

"Fine." Callie said, expecting a punishment like this - suitable for the crime unlike other homes she'd been in.

"And I'm going to ask Mike to take you to an AA meeting." Stef added as an afterthought.

Callie looked up nervously but before she could say anything Stef continued.

"Just a couple, just so you can see what it's like." She clarified. "I know you think that it was only a one time thing and it most likely is but I've seen how it can spiral out of control so I just want you to get an idea of what it's like before we actually get to that stage."

"Okay." Callie said. She knew Stef worried about this especially since she'd already dealt with it with Mike. "But could you come with us?" She asked, feeling uncomfortable going with Mike and listening to his story alone.

"Of course." Stef promised. "I love you." She said, kissing the top of Callie's head.

"I love you too." Callie replied as she rested her head back on her mother's shoulder, knowing that no matter what was to come she'd always have the support she needs.


End file.
